The love for obscurity

There's a point of your life when you embrace the dark cause you realise that you can't escape from it. And you start to feel a certain attraction to the fact that there's just confussion and sickness in your soul.
Of course, you thought you saw the light at some time but then made a come back to reality... and it was terrible. But then, you get it and it doesn't bother you to know that your life's gonna be complex and miserable at certain moments.